Sunday, April 23, 2017

Comedy show apologizes for racist sketch

(Dressing up in blackface isn't a good idea.)

Yesterday, I made chicken for dinner. I cooked the poultry using ample amounts of salt and grease. The bird came out all hot and crisp and delicious. Chicken is my specialty. I'm wonderful in the kitchen. Perhaps I'm half a fag. I washed the vittles down with two bottles of Charm soju and a big glass of beer. A good time was had by all.

I watched the first episode of Fargo. This is already season three. Time really flies. A probation officer is dating one of his parolees. She's a hot little pistol. He tries to get his brother to pay for her engagement ring, but he refuses. So the probation officer sends a felon to steal a valuable stamp from his brother's house. This feeble-minded criminal goes to the wrong house and kills an innocent grandfather. Fargo comes with my highest recommendation.

I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some dirty pagan. I thanked The Savior for his many blessings upon my life. For instance, it's fun to watch TV and eat chicken in the comfort of my own apartment. Unfortunately, lots of people will never experience this type of joy. They live in malaria-infested jungles across the planet. Things could always be worse. I'm just glad that I wasn't born in Chad.

I went to bed at 10 p.m. I dreamt I went on a trip to a shopping mall. I was with an older lady who loved to read books. I told her that I liked the novel Lolita. She called me disgusting.

I woke up at 9 a.m. and drank a cup of instant coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. A Korean comedienne is in trouble for dressing up in blackface. She apologized to the entire peninsula for being a racist. Koreans are very nice to white people and other Koreans. But they pretty much hate everybody else on the planet. However, I don't judge. I'm a stranger in a strange land, so I like to swim in the shallow end of the pool when it comes to social issues. Here's the link.

I turned on CNN. Erin Moran died at the age of fifty-six. She used to play Joanie on the hit show Happy Days. Erin had fallen on hard times because of alcohol and drugs. She even got kicked out of her trailer park in Indiana due to her raucous behavior. Life is filled with endless ups and downs. It's best to remain humble.

Anyway, my quiver is empty. So long for now, and God bless everybody. Stop by my message board to say hello. Cheers.

Saturday, April 22, 2017

Woman convicted of biting off tongue of man who demanded sex

(A Korean woman bites off a man's tongue.)

Yesterday, I made beef and French fries for dinner. I did a wonderful job. The meal was excellent. I especially liked the fries. They were hot and crisp and salty. I feel very comfortable in the kitchen. Perhaps I'm half-a-fag. I washed the vittles down with two bottles of soju and large cup of beer. A good time was had by all.

I watched another episode of The Shield. The new captain is very impressed with Vic's tough style. He gets results. What she fails to comprehend is that Vic is a psychopathic criminal who is leading two lives. Meanwhile, Shane is back on the strike team. Shane is also a psychopathic criminal who is leading two lives. The Shield is one of the best American shows in the history of television. It comes with my highest recommendation.

I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some dirty pagan. I thanked The Savior for his many blessings upon my life. For instance, it's fun to eat beef in the comfort of my own apartment. Unfortunately, lots of people will never get to experience this type of joy. These poor bastards live in countries where cows are considered sacred. Things could always be worse. I'm just glad that I wasn't born in India.

I went to bed at 9 p.m. I didn't dream. I woke up at 8 a.m. and drank a cup of instant coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. A fifty-six-year-old woman was enjoying a cocktail at a bar in Seoul. She was approached by a man who found her attractive. He requested sex and French-kissed the woman against her will. She promptly bit off six centimeters of his tongue. Talk about a tough old bird. Here's the link.

I turned on CNN. Aaron Hernandez used to play football for the New England patriots. But he never gave up his gangland ways. He murdered three people while playing professional ball, shooting his victims in cold blood. He also shot two people in the head who managed to survive. One of them served as an eye-witness in Aaron's latest trial. Hernandez hanged himself in his jail cell with a bed sheet. He finally killed someone who actually deserved it.

Anyway, my quiver is empty. So long for now, and God bless everybody. Stop by my message board to say hello. Cheers.

Tuesday, April 18, 2017

Chinese man and foreigner in bloody Beijing subway brawl

(It's important to behave.)

Yesterday, I had pork and French fries for dinner. The meat was quite succulent. All the juice ran down my fat chin. Furthermore, the fries were great, too. They were hot and salty and delicious. I washed the vittles down with several glasses of generic cola. I'm a broke dead dick, so I can't afford the good stuff.

I watched a new show on AMC called The Son. I really liked it. The program starts in Texas with a family being annihilated by the Comanche Indians. The mother is raped and killed, and her daughter gets greased by a gunshot wound. To make matters worse, the eldest son goes crazy, and his Indian captors take him out with a tomahawk to the head. The youngest boy survives and turns into a wannabe oil baron. The Son comes with my highest recommendation. Only a lonely fag would miss this series.

I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some dirty nihilist. I thanked The Savior for his many blessings upon my life. For instance, it's fun to watch TV in the comfort of my own home. Unfortunately, lots of people will never experience this type of joy. They spend their lives living in a dark hut because they have no electricity. Things could always be worse. I'm just glad that I wasn't born in Djibouti.

I went to bed at 10 p.m. I didn't dream. I woke up at 6 a.m. and drank a cup of instant coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. A Chinese man and a foreigner got into a fight on the Beijing subway. The foreigner bloodied his adversaries nose. But the Chinese man got revenge by spitting his blood in the white man's face. Both men were eventually arrested by the Chinese authorities. If I were king of the world, I'd have both of these troublemakers caned mercilessly in the town square. It's a good thing that nobody listens to me.

I turned on CNN. The liberals want Donald Trump to show his tax returns to the world. But I'm not all hot and bothered about the situation. The IRS is the most powerful institution on the face of the earth. They regularly turn kings into paupers. And they aren't known as a bastion of conservatism. Trust me. If Big Don isn't right with his finances, they will throw him in prison lickety-split. My point? Trump hasn't broken any laws, and that's good enough for me.

Anyway, my quiver is empty. So long for now, and God bless everybody. If you have some extra time, feel free to visit my message board to say hello. I'd love to hear from you. Cheers.

Monday, April 17, 2017

Gastric bypass surgery shatters Afghan woman's Korean dream

(Gastric bypass surgery is risky.)

Yesterday, I took my family to dinner at a local restaurant. We purchased four pork steaks and cooked them at the table. The meal was delicious. I'm a huge fan of pork. It's both cheap and delicious. I washed the vittles down with two bottles of soju. I became quite intoxicated. A good time was had by all.

I watched the UFC. The main fight of the evening featured Demetrious Johnson versus William Reis for the flyweight title. The match wasn't close. Demetrious is on another level from the fighters in his division. He controlled Reis easily for three rounds, cutting his opponent badly with many vicious elbows. The matt was stained crimson with William's blood. After that, he submitted Reis with an arm-bar. This marked the tenth defense of his title, tying the record held by Anderson Silva.

I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some filthy pagan. I thanked The Savior his many blessings upon my life. For instance, it's a ton of fun to watch the UFC in the comfort of my own home. Sadly, lots of people will never experience this type of joy. They live in grass huts and are forced to drink water tainted by malaria. Things could always be worse. I'm just glad that I wasn't born in Malawi.

I went to bed at 10 p.m. I had another dream about defecating in Burger King. The customers looked on in horror as a dropped a steamer on the floor.

I woke up at 6 a.m. and drank a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. An obese woman from Afghanistan is married to a naturalized Korean citizen. She went to the doctor to get a band placed on her stomach in order to lose weight. It turns out that she was pregnant at the time, and the procedure made it impossible for the fetus to get proper nutrition. Therefore, she was forced to have an abortion. She is now suing the hospital for emotional distress.

I turned on CNN. A large black guy from Ohio filmed himself on Facebook as he murdered an elderly man. The victim was also black. Furthermore, he admitted to committing many other homicides. The suspect is currently on the loose. He's considered armed and dangerous. If you see him, run as fast as your legs will carry you. This weirdo obviously has a few screws loose. If I were king of the world, I'd have him roasted alive in a giant barbecue pit. I'd even put an apple in his mouth. It's a good thing that nobody listens to me.

Anyway, my quiver is empty. So long for now, and God bless everybody. Don't forget to visit my message board. Cheers.

Sunday, April 16, 2017

Korean man assaults a pregnant nurse

(A Korean man assaulted a pregnant nurse in Seoul.)

Yesterday, I didn't eat supper. My wife went shopping with my youngest son. By the time they got back, I was fast asleep. But that's OK. I weigh nearly 250 pounds. That's 107 kilo grams for all you non-Americans. I should probably make a regular habit out of missing dinner from time to time.

I watched Korean baseball and drank beer. I consumed two large bottles of Hite. I became a little intoxicated if you want to know the truth. The SK Wyverns won another contest. They are now one game back of the 500 mark. The team is stacked from top to bottom with power hitters. They have a shot to win the championship. However, my money is on KIA.

I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some dirty misanthrope. I thanked The Savior for his many blessings upon my life. For instance, it's fun to watch baseball and drink beer in the comfort of my own home. Sadly, lots of people will never experience this type of joy. They come from Islamic countries and are publicly flogged if caught sipping the joy juice. Things could always be worse. I'm just glad that I wasn't born in Oman.

I went to bed at 8 p.m. I didn't dream. I woke up at 10 a.m. and drank a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. A Korean man from Seoul punched a pregnant nurse several times in the face. The man was unhappy because he had to wait to see a doctor. This idiot has a history of mental problems. Luckily, the unborn child is doing well. If I were kind of the world, I'd make this loon dig his own grave, and then I'd promptly shoot him right between the eyes. It's a good thing that nobody listens to me.

I turned on Fox News. North Korea unsuccessfully attempted to fire a missile. Some believe that the failure is directly attributed to American cyber-warfare. I wouldn't be surprised. President Trump is a breath of fresh air. I would call him Reagan-esque. Kim Jong-Un now has a target on his back. And his would-be assassins include the Chinese government. The fat little bastard isn't long for this world.

Anyway, my quiver is empty. So long for now, and God bless everybody. If you have some free time, check out my message board. Cheers.

Saturday, April 15, 2017

Woman caught stealing gold bracelets, hiding them in buttocks

(A woman from Seoul hides two bracelets in her anus.)

Yesterday, I took my family to a restaurant. We ate Han-oo beef. Han-oo beef comes from domestic cattle. It's extremely overpriced. I hate to waste my money on the stuff. Sadly, my wife likes it, so what's a boy to do? I washed the vittles down with two bottles of soju. A good time was had by all.

I watched baseball. The SK Wyverns battled the Hanwha Eagles. I cheer for the Wyverns because their manager is American. This is the first time in history that a man from my homeland has been placed in charge of a Korean baseball team. So what's not to like? The squad got off to a horrid start, dropping their first five games. But the ship has been righted, and they're currently winning games left and right. They won again last night.

I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some dirty nihilist. I thanked The Savior for his many blessings upon my life. For instance, it's fun to eat beef at a restaurant. Unfortunately, lots of people will never experience this type of joy. They spend their days slaving away to put money in the pocket of their dictator. Things could always be worse. I'm just glad that I wasn't born in North Korea.

I went to bed at 10 p.m. I didn't dream. I woke up at 10 a.m. and drank a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. A 20-year-old woman from Seoul stole two bracelets from a department store and hid them up her ass. However, her theft was caught on CCTV. The cops arrived on the scene and strip-searched the young lady. She was booked and later released on her own recognizance. The thief says that she often has the urge to steal when she's experiencing her period. Go figure.

I turned on Fox News. Today is the birthday of Kim Sung-Il. Sung-Il was the first North Korean leader, so this celebration is a big deal. On this holiday, the North Korean powers-that-be usually test their nuclear capabilities. However, Donald Trump gave them a stern warning not to pull their usual bullshit. Our new president even threatened the hermit nation with a preemptive strike. North Korea backed down. That's what true leadership looks like. I couldn't be prouder.

Anyway, my quiver is empty. So long for now, and God bless everybody. Enjoy the song of the day.

(Take It Easy)

Wednesday, April 5, 2017

Man jailed for hiring thugs to punish daughter's bullies

(A Korean father takes things a little too far.)

Yesterday, I had beef and Korean pancakes for dinner. The meal wasn't very good. My wife is capable of so much better. But I didn't complain. I just smiled and ate my food with a smile on my face and a song in my heart. I'm wonderful that way. The glass is always half-full at my humble abode. I washed the vittles down with several cups of generic cola. I'm a broke dead dick, so I can't afford the good stuff.

I watched the pilot episode of Twin Peaks. The show first aired nearly thirty years ago. The corpse of seventeen-year-old Laura Palmer is discovered near the banks of a river. She's wrapped in plastic. Agent Cooper from the FBI is called to the scene in order to solve this tragic crime. Cooper loves pie. His favorite seems to be cherry. In fact, he raves about pie all the time. I laughed and laughed and laughed. Missing Twin Peaks should be punishable by death. It's that good. The series comes with my highest recommendation.

I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some dirty pagan. I thanked The Savior for his many blessings upon my life. For instance, it's fun to watch television with a full stomach. Sadly, lots of people will never experience this type of joy. They're too busy feasting on scorpions and snakes along the banks of the Yangtze River. Things could always be worse. I'm just glad that I wasn't born in China.

I went to bed at 10 p.m. I didn't dream. I woke up at 6 a.m. and drank a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. A man in Ulsan was sentenced to a year in prison for assaulting his daughter's bullies. In fact, he hired six thugs to teach these mean girls a lesson. The thugs found them at school and dragged them out of their classrooms. Then they threatened to kill these young ladies with baseball bats. Dad obviously cares for his daughter. But he took it just a little too far.

I turned on Fox News. National Security Advisor Susan rice admitted that surveillance took place in Trump Tower. She also admitted to unmasking several American citizens who were caught up in the wiretapping. I'm not surprised. Ms. Rice is a very deceitful pig. In fact, she's the asshole who told us that Benghazi happened because of a YouTube video. If I were king of the world, I'd have this shameful whore tarred and feathered. It's a good thing that nobody listens to me.

Anyway, my quiver is empty. So long for now, and God bless everybody. Enjoy the song of the day.

(Neil Diamond)
   

Monday, April 3, 2017

Domestic violence traps migrant women

(Migrant wives are often victims of abuse.)

Yesterday, I had beef-fajitas for dinner. The meal was delicious. My wife is the beef-fajita queen. In fact, she's considered by many to be the Asian Martha Stewart. I washed the vittles down with several glasses of generic cola. I'm a broke dead dick, so I can't afford the good stuff.

I watched several episodes of The Shield. It's one of the greatest shows in the history of American television. Dutch is on the heels of a serial killer. This sick bastard rapes elderly women and strangles them after getting his rocks off. The detective eventually arrests the villain but is fascinated by the man's sickness. To that end, Dutch ends the episode by strangling a stray cat in a misguided attempt to understand his adversary. The Shield comes with my highest recommendation.

I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some dirty nihilist. I thanked The Savior for his many blessings upon my life. For instance, it's fun to watch cop shows while lying in bed. Sadly, lots of people will never experience this type of joy. They're actually too poor to purchase beds. So they sleep on the floor and are often terrorized by snakes, scorpions, and mosquitoes. Things could always be worse. I'm just glad that I wasn't born in India.

I went to bed at 10 p.m. I didn't dream. I woke up at 6 a.m. and drank a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. Lots of Korean men in the countryside can't find women. Therefore, they are sometimes forced to import brides from various countries. Of course, the vast majority of these ladies can't speak Korean. This lack of communication combined with copious amounts of alcohol often leads to domestic violence. These women seldom call the police. They prefer to suffer in silence fearing that their visas might get revoked.

I turned on Fox News. The life expectancy of non-college educated whites is actually dropping. This demographic is dying-off like flies. Many are expiring from heroin abuse while others are drinking themselves to an early grave. Living standards for this group simply aren't what they used to be. Their jobs have been shipped to other countries, and now they spend their days working in the service sector. Globalism has been a disaster. Let's hope that President Trump can get us out of the shit.

Anyway, my quiver is empty. So long, and God bless everybody. Enjoy the song of the day. 

(Ozzy)

Sunday, April 2, 2017

Woman dead after drinking 60 bottles of soju with friend

(A woman drinks herself to death on soju.)

Yesterday, my wife made pork and French fries for dinner. The meat was quite succulent. The drippings slid down my fat chin. Furthermore,  the fries were crisp and salty--just the way I like them. I slaked my thirst with several glasses of generic cola. I'm a broke dead dick, so I can't afford the good stuff.

I watched an episode of Supernatural. Mary Winchester is back from the dead. She's now helping the British Men of Letters. Dean is beside himself with anger. He throws his very own mother right out of his house. Meanwhile, Sam follows Mary to her new digs. Unbeknownst to them, they're being hunted by a nest of vampires. Sam kills the alpha with his magical Colt revolver. Supernatural is a lot of fun. It comes with my highest recommendation.

I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some dirty pagan. I thanked The Savior for his many blessings upon my life. For instance, it's fun to munch on pork while sitting on a comfortable sofa. Sadly, lots of people will never experience this type of joy. They're so poor that they wipe their asses with their bare hands. Things could always be worse. I'm just glad that I wasn't born in Laos.

I went to bed at 10 p.m. I didn't dream. I woke up at 7 a.m. and drank a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. Two Koreans met each other at a clinic for recovering alcoholics. They hit it off romantically. After that, they rented a cheap motel and made a pact to drink themselves to death. They consumed over sixty bottles of soju in ten days. The woman died, but the man is still alive. Addiction is a sad tale.

I turned on Fox News. A fifteen-year-old black girl was murdered by a group of illegal aliens. The suspects belong to a gang called MS-13. These criminals are notorious for their violent ways. America is turning into a third-world cesspool. The public schools are shit. The healthcare is atrocious. And the cities are more violent than Baghdad. I just hope that President Trump can work a miracle with the help of Jesus--because it's going to take divine intervention to set things right.

Anyway, my quiver is empty. So long for now, and God bless everybody. Enjoy the song of the day.

(The Beach Boys)

Friday, March 31, 2017

Murder suspect says 'I don't remember'

(An eight-year-old girl was murdered in Inchon.)

Yesterday, I went to McDonald's for dinner. I had a Big Mac and a large order of French fries. The meal was delicious. All that starch sent me straight to the moon. I washed the vittles down with several glasses of genuine Coca-Cola. I'm a broke dead dick, so usually I drink the generic stuff. But sometimes a man has to splurge.

I watched several episodes of The Shield. Ronnie and Tavon get into a huge fight. Ronnie's wife hits Tavon on the side of the head with a hot iron. The poor guy stumbles out the door with blood leaking down the side of his face. He gets into an accident and crashes through the front window of his van. The Shield is one of the best shows in the history of television. Anyone who refuses to watch is a fag. Plain and simple.

I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some filthy pagan. I thanked The Savior for his many blessings upon my life. For instance, eating fast-food is a hoot. Sadly, lots of people will never experience this type of joy. They are too busy feasting on snakes and lizards in order to stay alive. Things could always be worse. I'm just glad that I wasn't born in Tanzania.

I went to bed at ten o'clock. I dreamt about having coitus with a beautiful black woman. We had a wonderful time. She really seemed to like me.

I woke up at 6 a.m. and drank a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. A seventeen-year-old female Korean got arrested for killing and dismembering an eight-year-old girl. The crime took place in the city of Inchon. The suspect claims that she can't remember a thing. If I were king of the world, I'd have this low-life burnt at the stake on the charge of witchcraft. It's a good thing that nobody listens to me.

I turned on Fox News. President Trump is at odds with the conservative members of the Republican party. They refused to pass his health care plan, so he's steamed. Donald desperately needs a win. The best thing he could do is concentrate on tax reform and building the wall. Getting the trillion dollar infrastructure program off the ground wouldn't hurt, either. I feel the president's pain. My country needs a single-payer health care system. It's time to put the insurance companies out of business.

Anyway, my quiver is empty. So long for now, and God bless everybody. Enjoy the song of the day.

(Kansas)

Tuesday, March 28, 2017

Prosecution seeks warrant to arrest Park

(Lots of Korean presidents have gone to jail.)

Yesterday, I had hot-wings and French fries for dinner. The meal was delicious. The chicken was so hot that it nearly burned a hole in my tongue. But that's OK. I love spicy cuisine. My wife is a wonderful cook. She's the Asian Martha Stewart. I washed the vittles down with several glasses of generic cola. I'm a broke dead dick, so I can't afford the good stuff.

I watched the latest episode of The Walking Dead. Negan attempts to recruit another one of Rick's crew. This time, he's brainwashing the skinny black girl who used to date Abraham. She's currently locked in a closet with the body of a dead walker. Meanwhile, Rick and his friends have stolen the guns from the Amazon camp. Rick plans to make Negan bleed. The Walking Dead comes with my highest recommendation.

I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some filthy pagan. I thanked The Savior for his many blessings upon my life. For instance, it's fun to watch zombie shows while relaxing in bed. Sadly, lots of people will never experience this type of joy. They drink dirty water and eat whatever they can catch. Things could always be worse. I'm just glad that I wasn't born in Gambia.

I went to bed at 10 p.m. I didn't dream. I woke up at 6 a.m. and drank a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. The Korean powers-that-be now wish to arrest former president Park Geun-hye for corruption. This news really isn't a big deal. Lots of Korean leaders have spent time in the pen. The peninsula is rife with political crime. Money is always changing hands to pay for favors.

I turned on Fox News. Paul Ryan's new health care plan completely shit the bed. President Trump must be careful. First of all, Ryan has never been a friend. The man should be publicly flogged and driven from the senate. Secondly, is Donald just another dyed-in-the-wool Republican pretending to be a crusader? Paul Ryan is the type of silly choice that ass-hats like Mitt Romney would make. Trump had better get his head out of his rump, or he'll be out the door in four years.

Anyway, my quiver is empty. So long for now, and God bless everybody. Enjoy the song of the day.

(In the Court of the Crimson King)

Thursday, March 23, 2017

Operations start to lift Sewol ferry

(The Korean government is trying to raise the Sewol ferry.)

Yesterday, I had pork and French fries for dinner. The meal was delicious. My wife's an excellent cook. She's the Asian Martha Stewart. We eat a lot of pig at my humble abode. It's both cheap and tasty. I washed the vittles down with several glasses of generic cola. I'm a broke dead dick, so I can't afford the good stuff.

I watched an episode of Criminal Minds. It's the sickest show on television. A disturbed young man believes that Satan killed his parents after they get sucked into a massive sinkhole. He hated his mom and dad, so he wants to thank the dark overlord by sending the fallen angel innocent souls. To that end, he kidnaps the nicest people he can find and forces them to commit suicide. Criminal Minds comes with my highest recommendation.

I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some filthy misanthrope. I thanked The Savior for his many blessings upon my life. For instance, it's nice to eat pork and French fries. Sadly, lots of people will never experience this type of joy. These unfortunate bastards live in Muslim countries and are forced by their governments to abstain from consuming pigs. Things could always be worse. I'm just glad that I wasn't born in Saudi Arabia.

I went to bed at 10 p.m. I dreamt that I went to China for a vacation. I was nearly bitten by a deadly cobra. I cried out happily when the snake's fangs missed my flesh.

I woke up at 6 a.m. and drank a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. The Korean government is attempting to lift the Sewol ferry from the bottom of the ocean. The Sewol sank back in 2014, killing over 300 people. Most of the victims were high school students. Korea is a weird place. There is virtually no street crime. You can walk safely in Seoul at any time of the day or night. But the ROK's blatant disregard for safety kills a ton of people every year. Go figure.

I turned on Fox News. Devin Nunes has confirmed that the government wire-tapped Trump Towers both before and after the election. This surveillance required a FISA warrant, so the person being watched was an American citizen. In other words, the Russia story is a giant sack of shit. The spooks don't need a FISA warrant to spy on foreigners. I'm not surprised that the intelligence community got caught again with their greasy hands in the cookie jar. We all remember James Clapper lying to congress about data collection. I've said it before. Trump needs to take these assholes down a peg or two.

Anyway, my quiver is empty. So long for now, and God bless everybody. Enjoy the song of the day.

(Ringo Star)

Tuesday, March 21, 2017

American woman assaults Korean taxi driver

(An English teacher assaults a Korean taxi driver.)

Yesterday, I had chicken and French fries for dinner. I wasn't too crazy about the meal. The chicken was stale, and the fries were soggy. But I didn't complain. I just ate my vittles with a smile on my face and a song in my heart. I'm wonderful that way. The glass is always half-full at my humble abode.

I watched the latest episode of Homeland. Carrie's child is still in foster care. Social services believes that her lifestyle is a threat to the young girl. On top of that, Carrie is a manic depressive who has all kinds of weapons stored around her house. Meanwhile, Peter wants his vengeance against the man who murdered his former friend-with-benefits. He gets the info he needs by threatening to kill his former boss. Homeland is a great show. I recommend it highly.

I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some dirty nihilist. I thanked The Savior for his many blessings upon my life. For instance, it's fun to watch great television in bed. Sadly, lots of people will never experience this type of joy. They're so poor that they can't afford beds. Instead, they sleep on the cold floors of their hovels. Things could always be worse. I'm just glad that I wasn't born in India.

I went to bed at 10 p.m. I didn't dream. I woke up at 6 a.m. and drank a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. An American English teacher in Seoul was arrested by the police. She stands accused of kicking a taxi driver several times in the stomach and legs. This 34-year-old crazy woman admitted her crime to the police. However, she blamed the driver for taking a wrong turn. If I were king of the world, I'd have this trollop caned and deported. It's a good thing that nobody listens to me.

I turned on Fox News. Donald Trump nominated Neil Gorsuch for the Supreme Court. Mr. Gorsuch is now trying to get confirmed by the powers-that-be. He's a strong choice who stands firmly against abortion. Therefore, the democrats are doing everything they can to get in his way. Modern day liberals are really beyond my comprehension. They leave a trail of dead babies and transgendered bathrooms wherever they go. I just don't understand them. Perhaps I'm retarded.

Anyway, my quiver is empty. So long for now, and God bless everybody. Enjoy the song of the day.

(Rocky Top)

Monday, March 20, 2017

US, China poles apart over NK

(America is getting tired of North Korea's antics.)

Yesterday, I had pork and French fries for dinner. The meal was delicious. The meat was juicy, and the fries were crisp and salty. My wife is a talented cook. She's the Asian Martha Stewart. I washed the vittles down with several glasses of generic cola. I'm a broke dead dick, so I can't afford the good stuff.

I watched the UFC. The best fight of the night featured Alan Jouban against Gunnar Nelson. The first round seemed evenly matched, but I gave it to Nelson because he managed to score a take down. In the second round, Gunnar hurt Alan with a sneaky right hand. After that, he choked his opponent until the poor man was forced to tap. I love the UFC. All that blood makes me feel like an arm-chair Viking.

(Gunnar Nelson smothers Alan Jouban in UFC Fight Night 107.)

I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some dirty pagan. I thanked The Savior for his many blessings upon my life. For instance, it's fun to munch on pork and French fries in a warm dry apartment. Sadly, lots of people will never experience this type of joy. They're so poor that they use their own hands for toilet paper. I'm just glad that I wasn't born in the Philippines.

I went to bed at 10 p.m. I didn't dream. I woke up at 6 a.m. and drank a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. Rex Tillerson met the president of China. He expressed his regret regarding North Korea's missile program. Tillerson claims that a first-strike response from the United States is firmly on the table. He wants China to control its belligerent neighbors.

I turned on Fox News. Rapper Snoop Dog made a video where he shoots a clown dressed up like Donald Trump. To make matters worse, Snoop's nephew Little Bow Wow said that he wanted to turn Melania Trump into a whore and force her to turn tricks. What's happening to the African-American community? How can this type of rhetoric be seen as civilized? I truly don't get it.

Anyway, my quiver is empty. So long for now, and God bless everybody. Enjoy the song of the day.

(Ozzy)

Sunday, March 12, 2017

Deaths, injuries in protest after impeachment decision riles Park supporters

(President Park gets kicked out of office.)

Yesterday, I took my family to a restaurant. We had sashimi with all the fixings. The meal came with kimchi, steamed fish, and raw shrimp. We also ate tortured octopus. The poor beast was cut to pieces while still alive. We devoured the tentacles as they squirmed to and fro. I washed the vittles down with two bottles of soju. A good time was had by all.

I watched several episodes of The Shield. The Shield is one of the greatest television shows that America has ever produced. Dutch is on the trail of a serial killer. This pervert has just murdered a 12-year-old prostitute. He enlists the help of an FBI profiler. The agent is forced to give Dutch the bad news. Many more will die before the culprit is brought to justice. The Shield is a work of pure genius. It comes with my highest recommendation.

I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some filthy pagan. I thanked The Savior for his many blessings upon my life. For instance, it's fun to eat raw fish with my family. Sadly, lots of people will never experience this type of joy. They're dead broke and are often reduced to feasting on rat meat and cold rice. Things could always be worse. I'm just glad that I wasn't born in Laos.

I went to bed at 10 p.m. I didn't dream. I woke up at noon and drank a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. The Korean president was removed from office. This set off violent riots in Seoul. Three people were killed and countless others were sent to hospital. Dying for a corrupt politician like President Park seems kind of pointless. Even her father was a crooked stooge.

I turned on Fox News. Trump has been doing some good things. Nearly 300,000 jobs were created in states like Pennsylvania, Michigan, and Indiana. Plus illegal immigration is down. Donald is fulfilling his promises. He's building a wall across our southern border, and he's also dismantling Obamacare. It's nice to have a leader who does what he says and says what he means.

Anyway, my quiver is empty. So long for now, and God bless everybody. Enjoy the song of the day.

(Paul Simon)

Thursday, March 9, 2017

'Pro-female activist' student booked for upskirt photo

(A Koran pervert got nabbed taking naughty photos.)

Yesterday, I had chicken wings for dinner. The meal was so hot that it nearly burnt a hole in my mouth. I actually drank a liter of Pepsi in order to control the pain. But I like to eat spicy stuff, so I'm not complaining. I find the extreme discomfort exhilarating. Who knows? Maybe I'm a masochist.

I watched the season finale of Gotham. The Joker is finally subdued by Bruce Wayne and promptly sent to the local insane asylum. Meanwhile, the Penguin expresses his forbidden love for the Riddler. In response, the Riddler shoots him in the abdomen and shoves him off a barge. I'm really getting sick of the homosexual agenda. Even comic book characters are being turned into fags by the Hollywood elite. Is nothing sacred?

I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some filthy nihilist. I thanked The Savior for his many blessings upon my life. For instance, it's fun to eat chicken and drink cola. Sadly, lots of people will never experience this joy. They live in the deep dark jungle and have never actually tasted first-rate poultry. Things could always be worse. I'm just glad that I wasn't born in the Amazon Rain Forest.

I went to bed at 10 p.m. I didn't dream. I woke up at 6 a.m. and drank a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. A Korean college student got arrested for taking upskirt photos of unsuspecting young women. The irony is that he was a pro-female activist on his college campus. He often criticized male students for speaking about the ladies as if they were sexual objects. Go figure.

I turned on Fox News. Wikileaks had a recent document dump describing how the CIA spies on its targets. These spooks can track you through your smart phones, laptops, and television sets. None of the news was actually very surprising. The American intelligence community is out of control. Trump needs to take these assholes down a peg or two.

Anyway, my quiver is empty. So long for now, and God bless everybody. Enjoy the song of the day.

(Pink Houses)

Wednesday, March 8, 2017

Liberal lawmaker 'revenged' with nude images

(Pyo Chang Won is being lampooned by his fellow citizens.)

Yesterday, I had chicken soup for dinner. The chicken was stuffed with rice and ginseng, and served in a broth. The meal was delicious. My wife's a great cook. She's the Asian Martha Stewart. I washed the vittles down with several cups of genuine Pepsi Cola. I'm a broke dead dick, so I usually drink the generic stuff. But sometimes a man has to splurge.

I watched The Bates Motel. Norman killed his mother last season. Her carcass now resides in the fruit cellar. However, Norman's convinced that she's still alive. He often talks to her even though she's not really there. He also dresses in drag to kill his victims. Norman just met the Loomis girl. Things will not end well. I give The Bates Motel my highest recommendation. I like it a lot.

I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some dirty atheist. I thanked The Savior for his many blessings upon my life. For instance, it's a ton of fun to watch first-rate television programs. Sadly, lots of people will never experience this type of joy. They live in the woods and have no access to electricity. Things could always be worse. I'm just glad that I'm not some mountain man living in Montana.

I went to bed at 9 p.m. I didn't dream. I woke up at 6 a.m. and drank a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. Pyo Chang Won is a liberal politician in Korea. Lately, protesters have been hanging naked pictures of him and his wife around Seoul. The photographs are fakes. Nevertheless, the lawmaker wants to catch the offenders so that they can be severely punished. Democracy is still in its infancy here on the ROK.

I turned on Fox News. The Republicans are presenting their alternative to Obamacare. Their ideas seem to be complete bullshit which will bankrupt my countrymen. I support a single-payer system. The cost of health care is killing the average American and driving down our standard of living. It's time to let the government have a crack at the problem. And why not? The private sector is draining us dry.

Anyway, my quiver is empty. So long for now, and God bless everybody. Enjoy the song of the day.

(Summer Nights)

Monday, March 6, 2017

Korea to take on Israel in WBC 1st round

(Korea plays Israel tonight in baseball.)

Yesterday, I took my family to a restaurant. We had sashimi with all the trimmings. The meal included raw shrimp, kimchi, and steamed fish. We also devoured an octopus that was cut into pieces while still alive. It's tentacles moved as we ate the meat. I washed the vittles down with two bottles of soju. Sashimi and soju go together like ketchup and French fries. A good time was had by all.

I watched UFC 209. The main bout featured a match between Tyron Woodley and Steven Thompson. Both men were very cautious. The respect that they showed for one another turned into a real drag. They were terrified to let their hands go. The crowd showed their dissatisfaction by booing the fighters. In my opinion, UFC 209 was a dud. But these things happen. I remain an ardent fan.

I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some filthy pagan. I thanked The Savior for his many blessings upon my life. For instance, eating raw fish and drinking booze is a ton of fun. Sadly, lots of people will never experience this type of joy. They live in landlocked countries where fresh fish is not available. I'm just glad that I wasn't born in Afghanistan.

I went to bed at 10 p.m. I didn't dream. I woke up at 6 a.m. and drank a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. The Word Baseball Classic starts today. Korea will challenge Israel at the Sky Dome in Seoul at 6:30 p.m. I'm a big fan of baseball. My favorite team is the SK Wyverns. They just hired an American manager, and I feel it's important to support my countryman. I'm wonderful that way.

I turned on Fox News. Trump claims that Trump Tower was bugged by the Obama administration. Many believe that Donald is a paranoid loon. But I have faith in the guy. The American government is corrupt to the core. For instance, we know that the NSA has been spying on our citizens for years, so the idea that Obama would pull a dirty trick like this doesn't strike me as being too far-fetched. I believe that Trump will uncover a lot of dirt about our leaders. That's why they all hate the guy.

Anyway, my quiver is empty. So long for now, and God bless everybody. Enjoy the song of the day.

(Zebra)

Saturday, March 4, 2017

Drunken woman sets herself on fire after fight with husband

(A Korean woman set herself on fire.)

Yesterday, I went to McDonald's for dinner. I had a Big Mac and a large order of French fries. The meal was delicious. I'm a huge fan of junk food. All that starch sends me straight to the moon. I washed the vittles down with a huge cup of genuine Coca-Cola. I'm a broke dead dick, so I usually drink the generic stuff. But sometimes a man has to splurge.

I watched several episodes of Banshee. Banshee is an overwrought crime drama featuring lots of sex and violence. Nevertheless, it's quite entertaining. Rebecca has been cruelly killed by a satanic serial killer. The guy actually has horns. And now the entire town is desperately searching for the culprit. Meanwhile, the Aryan Brotherhood is attempting to take over the drug trade from the show's main gangster.

I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some dirty pagan. I thanked The Savior for his many blessings upon my life. For instance, it's fun to eat hamburgers and French fries in a nice warm apartment. Sadly, lots of people will never experience this type of joy. They are too poor to eat meat. Things could always be worse. I'm just glad that I wasn't born in Liberia.

I went to bed at 10 p.m. I dreamt that I accidentally touched a young woman on her buttocks. She threatened to report me to the police. I apologized profusely. Luckily, she forgave me.

I woke up at 7 a.m. and drank a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. A woman from Seoul got into an argument with her husband. During the heated conversation, she became very drunk. She demanded her car keys, but her husband told her to take a taxi. She then set herself on fire with gasoline. She's currently recovering from second-degree burns at a local hospital.

I turned on Fox News. The democrats want Jeff Sessions to resign because he talked to the Russian ambassador. Sessions refuses to resign, but he has recused himself from the investigation. This is a slimey ploy by the powers-that-be to delegitimize the Trump presidency. But it won't work. Big Don shall remain in power for the next eight years.

Anyway, my quiver is empty. So long for now, and God bless everybody. Enjoy the song of the day.

Tuesday, February 28, 2017

Dog meat market to close down

(The Moran dog meat market is now closed.)

Yesterday, I had beef and French fries for dinner. The meal was excellent. My wife is a great cook. She's the Asian Martha Stewart. I washed the vittles down with several glasses of generic cola. I'm a broke dead dick, so I can't afford the good stuff.

I watched an episode of Gotham. The Joker has his face cut off by a sycophant who is trying to bring the arch-criminal back from the dead. The Joker wakes up wondering what happened to his visage. He tracks the guy down and staples his flesh back onto his head. Then he blows up a chemical factory as he laughs on live television like a madman. Gotham is disturbing. It's doesn't remotely resemble the Batman I used to see as a child. Maybe that's a good thing. Blam. Splat. Kapow.


I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some filthy misanthrope. I thanked The Savior for his many blessings upon my life. For instance, it's fun to eat beef in a warm apartment. Sadly, lots of people will never experience this type of joy. They live in the hot desert and feast on deadly cobras. Things could always be worse. I'm just glad that I wasn't born in Djibouti.

I went to bed at 10 p.m. I didn't dream. I woke up at 6 a.m. and drank a freshly brewed cup of coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. The Korean government is closing down the infamous Moran dog meat market. 80,000 dogs were annually slaughtered and sold in this location. Lately, nearby residents have been complaining about the noise and the smell. So the denizens of the peninsula will have to buy their canine elsewhere.

I turned on Fox News. Neil Cavuto claims that Trump is responsible for the jump in the stock market. And he's absolutely right. But I wouldn't celebrate just yet. Interest rates are still at historic lows, giving the American bullshit economy an artificial boost. We won't know where we truly are until we get back to a normal three percent.

Anyway, my quiver is empty. So long for now, and God bless everybody. Enjoy the song of the day.

(Ride On)

Monday, February 27, 2017

S. Korea defeats Cuba 6-1 in warm-up before World Baseball Classic

(Baseball is very popular in Korea.)

Yesterday, I took my family to a restaurant. We had sashimi with all the fixings. The meal came with raw shrimp, kimchi, and steamed fish. My youngest son loves sashimi. He shoveled the food into his mouth at the speed of light. He's an expert at the chopsticks. I consumed two bottles of soju. A good time was had by all.

I watched Hacksaw Ridge. It's playing at the local cinema. The movie is wonderful. It centers around an army private named Dawes who's a conscientious objector. He wins the Medal of Honor for saving seventy-five men from the Japanese pagans during WWII. Mel Gibson's a treasure. His films are often inspired works of genius. Who will ever forget Braveheart or The Passion of the Christ? Certainly not me. He was supposed to make a movie about Vikings several years ago. However, he got caught badmouthing the Jews, and his career took a huge hit. It's good to see him back to form.

I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some dirty atheist. I thanked The Savior for his many blessings upon my life. For instance, it's wonderful to take the family to the movies from time to time. Sadly, lots of people will never experience this type of joy. They live in the deep dark jungles and eat fried tarantula for supper. Talk about a pisser. Things could always be worse. I'm just glad that I wasn't born in Borneo.

I went to bed at 10 p.m. I didn't dream. I woke up at 6 a.m. and drank a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. South Korea defeated Cuba 6-1 in baseball. Baseball is the most popular sport on the peninsula. The stadiums are always full on the weekends. I used to support the Samsung Lions, but now I'm an SK Wyverns man. SK has an American manager. He needs all the support that he can get.

I turned on Fox News. Darrell Issa is calling for an independent investigation of Trump and his ties to Russia. Issa is a turncoat republican, and he needs to go take a flying screw at a rolling donut. Hillary lost because her vaunted blue wall collapsed. The working class people thought she was disgusting. Putin had nothing to do with it. Big Don should start kicking ass and taking names. It's time for traitors to feel his wrath.

Anyway, my quiver is empty. So long for now, and God bless everybody. Enjoy the song of the day.

(For Whom the Bell Tolls)

Friday, February 24, 2017

105 offenders caught in teenage prostitution bust

(Prostitution is a huge problem in Korea.)

Yesterday, I had chicken tortillas for dinner. The meal was excellent. My wife is the tortilla queen. I shoved food into my unattractive mouth at an alarming pace. It truly felt like my stomach was about to burst. I washed the vittles down with several glasses of generic cola. I'm a broke dead dick, so I can't afford the good stuff.

I watched the latest episode of Six. One of the SEALs is killed while attempting to rescue Rip. His buddies put his ashes into a canon and fire his remains across a golf course. Meanwhile, Walton Goggins is forced to call himself a war criminal on national television. If he refuses to comply, several Nigerian school girls will get blown to bits. I'm a big fan of Walton. He has the best teeth in showbiz.

(Walton and His Wonderful Teeth)

I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some filthy pagan. I thanked The Savior for his many blessings upon my life. For instance, it's fun to eat chicken while watching TV. Unfortunately, lots of people will never experience this type of joy. They're so poor that they use their bare hands as toilet paper. Things could always be worse. I'm just glad that I wasn't born in the Philippines.

I went to bed at 10 p.m. I dreamt that I defecated in a tiny bathroom in New York City. The walls were made of glass. All the denizens of the Big Apple could see my bare ass.

I woke up at 6 a.m. and drank a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. 105 Koreans were apprehended in a teenage prostitution ring. Asia is rife with prostitution, and the peninsula is no exception. Purchasing sex is supposedly illegal, but it happens all the time. It's very sad when children get caught up in the world's oldest profession. If I were the king of the universe, I'd throw all these assholes off a cliff. But sadly nobody listens to me.

I turned on Fox News. CPAC is now underway, and Trump is the star of the show. Even the great Ron Paul has been overshadowed by our wonderful new leader. I truly feel that Donald might go down as the greatest president in our nation's history. In order to secure his legacy, he must transform the tired old Republican Party into the American Workers Party. He needs to keep the working class in the tent.

Anyway, my quiver is empty. So long for now, and God bless everybody. Enjoy the song of the day.

(Let 'Em In)

Thursday, February 23, 2017

Woman jumps in front of subway train in Daegu

(Suicide is a huge problem in Korea.)

Yesterday, I had beef and French fries for dinner. The meal was wonderful. I ate every last morsel on my plate. My wife's an excellent cook. She's the Asian Martha Stewart. I washed the vittles down with several glasses of generic cola. I'm a broke dead dick, so I can't afford the good stuff.

I watched another episode of Supernatural with my son. Dean gets zapped by a malignant witch. The spell turns his brains into goo. He can't remember anything--including his own name. Consequently, Sam is forced to place a call to evil Rowena in order to get some help. They end up killing three witches--thereby breaking the spell. Supernatural comes with my highest recommendation. The show has a great sense of humor.

I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some filthy pagan. I thanked The Savior for his many blessings upon my life. For instance, it's great to eat beef from time to time. Unfortunately, lots of people will never experience this type of joy. They live in the deep dark jungle and are forced to feast on monkey brains. Things could always be worse. I'm just glad that I wasn't born in Uganda.

I went to bed at 10 p.m. I didn't dream. I woke up at 6 a.m. and drank a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. A twenty-eight-year-old Korean woman from Daegu tried to kill herself by jumping in front of a subway train. Luckily, her attempt failed. Depression is a huge problem here on the peninsula. Korea leads the world in suicides. Most commit the deed by jumping out of their apartment windows. Maybe the government should start putting happy pills into the nation's drinking water.

I turned on Fox News. Next month, the Supreme Court will decide if transgendered people should be allowed to use the bathroom of their choice. Donald Trump, however, believes the issue should be settled by each individual state. His detractors state that this is an issue of civil rights rather than states' rights. I have a penis, so I always use the men's room. The last thing I want to do is lay down a nasty deuce next to a female stranger. But that's just me.

Anyway, my quiver is empty. So long for now, and God bless everybody. Enjoy the song of the day.

(Rock and Roll Girls)

Wednesday, February 22, 2017

Drunk threw egg near President's mansion

(A man was fined for throwing an egg near the president's mansion)

Yesterday, I had hot chicken soup for dinner. The meal also included rice and ginseng mixed with the broth. My wife is a wonderful cook. I ate every last drop in my bowl. I washed the vittles down with several glasses of generic cola. I'm a broke dead dick, so I can't afford the good stuff.

I watched several episodes of Supernatural with my nine-year-old son. He's a huge fan of the show. Lucifer is running amok in America. He's now in charge of the White House and has even impregnated one of his staff. Sam and Dean save the president with a magical golden egg which casts Satan back to hell. Supernatural sounds pretty stupid, but the show is actually a lot of fun. All the jokes snap, crackle, and pop. I give it my highest recommendation.

I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some filthy pagan. I thanked The Savior for his many blessings upon my life. For instance, it's fun to watch Supernatural while slurping on chicken soup. Sadly, lots of people will never experience this type of joy. They eat monkey brains and wash it down with tainted water. Things could always be worse. I'm just glad that I wasn't born in Tanzania.

I went to bed at 10 p.m. I dreamt that one of my friends was on anti-depressants. I asked if I could have her pills. She told me no.

I woke up at 6 a.m. and drank a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. A drunk Korean man threw an egg near President Park Geun-Hye's mansion in Seoul. He's angry about the current political strife here on the peninsula. The cops brought him to the station. He was then given a twenty-five dollar fine.

I turned on Fox News. Milo has resigned from Breitbart News. He got caught saying some nasty things about pedophilia. For instance, he praised his abusive priest and said it was OK for willing teenage boys to have sex with adult men. I'm glad that Milo's gone. His campy act was starting to get under my skin. I've got nothing against homosexuals. But the last thing we need is a flamboyant queen as the new face of conservative politics.

Anyway, my quiver is empty. So long for now, and God bless everybody. Enjoy the song of the day.

(Boy George)

Tuesday, February 21, 2017

US soldier charged with rape in Busan guesthouse

(A US soldier was recently charged with rape.)

Yesterday, I had spicy chicken for dinner. The poultry was so hot that it nearly burned a hole through my tongue. But that's OK. I like fiery vittles. I washed the meal down with several bottles of water. Sometimes, water is the only drink which truly quenches my thirst.

I watched the UFC. The main event featured a bout between Derrick The Black Beast Lewis and Travis Happa Browne. Both men are epic bad asses. Travis started the fight with many kicks to Lewis's midsection. The Black Beast doubled over in pain on several occasions. However, Derrick managed to turn out Happa's lights in the second round with a huge right hand. The match was one for the ages. The UFC seldom fails to please me.

I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some filthy pagan. I thanked The Savior for his many blessings upon my life. For instance, eating fiery chicken is a lot of fun. However, many people will never experience this kind of joy. They spend every waking hour toiling in the fields for a little bit of rice. Things could always be worse. I'm just glad that I wasn't born in rural China.

I went to bed at 10 p.m. I dreamt that I was being forced to climb a mountain by my wife.

I said, "OK, I'll climb the fucking thing. Just leave me alone."

I woke up at 6 a.m. and drank a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. A US soldier has been charged with raping a Korean woman in the city of Busan. The man met the young lady over a dating application. They had drinks at a local eatery and became intoxicated. According to the victim, he forced himself upon her even though she resisted. The soldier claims that he is innocent.

I turned on Fox News. President Trump called the media the enemy of the people in a recent press conference. I love Trump. He's the king of hyperbole. Furthermore, his orange skin is very attractive. Big Don has a point. The media really dropped the ball when it came to fair election coverage. According to the talking heads, Hillary's victory was a slam dunk.

Anyway, my quiver is empty. So long for now, and God bless everybody. Enjoy the song of the day.

(Proud Mary)
 

Friday, February 17, 2017

Grammy-nominated British DJ convicted of drug smuggling

(A British DJ brought GHB into Korea.)

Yesterday, I took my family to a restaurant for sashimi. We also ate freshly cut octopus. The tentacles were still wiggling back and forth as we swallowed it. The meal was delicious. I'm a huge fan of seafood. I washed the vittles down with two bottles of soju. Soju and raw fish go together like ketchup and French fries. A good time was had by all.

I watched the latest episode of Six. The show stars Walton Goggins as a former Navy SEAL captured by Boko Haram. He's placed in a cell and forced to watch as one of his female friends is gang-raped by crazy Muslims. Six is a great series filled with violence and naughty language. I give it my highest recommendation. But I'm biased. I love Walton Goggins. He's got the best teeth in the universe. They're so big and white.

(Walton Goggins and his teeth.)

I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some dirty pagan. I thanked The Savior for his many blessings upon my life. For instance, it's fun to eat sashimi at a local restaurant. Sadly, lots of people will never experience this type of joy. They're so poor that they often get their dinner from a dumpster. Things could always be worse. I'm just glad that I'm not some hobo living in Chicago.

I went to bed at 10 p.m. I had another dream about defecating on the floor at Burger King. The customers were horrified. One irate woman even hit me with her Whopper.

I woke up at 6 a.m. and drank a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. A British DJ was convicted on charges of drug smuggling. He got caught with GHB at the Incheon Airport. This lowlife was sentenced to two years in prison. However, the sentence was suspended by a lenient judge. GHB is often used to rape women. It renders people unconscious when put in their drinks. If I were king of the world, I'd throw that sick bastard off a cliff. It's a good thing nobody listens to me.

I turned on Fox News. Former general Mike Flynn was forced to resign after leaks revealed he was cozy with the Russian ambassador. Trump blamed the overzealous media for destroying the reputation of a good man. And Big Don is absolutely right. The assholes at CNN and NBC keep implying that the president and his advisors are dangerous Manchurian candidates who are in bed with Vladimir Putin. These networks even questioned whether or not Flynn is traitor to his country. The whole idea is laughable.

Anyway, my quiver is empty. So long for now, and God bless everybody. Enjoy the song of the day.

(The Band)