Wednesday, May 24, 2017

Koreans caught smuggling 2,348kg of gold in 'private parts'

(That gold is cold.)

Yesterday, I took my family to McDonald's for dinner. The meal was fantastic. I had a Big Mac and a large order of French fries. I'm a huge fan of junk food. All that starch sends me straight to the moon. I washed the vittles down with a cold glass of genuine Coca-Cola. I'm a broke dead dick, so I usually drink the generic stuff. But sometimes a man has to splurge.

I turned on CNN. A young man named Devon Arthurs used to be a neo-Nazi. However, he decided to convert to Islam instead. Devon had two roommates who made fun of his new religion. So he shot them both dead with a pistol. Mr. Arthurs is only eighteen-years-old. Talk about a moron. If I were king of the world, I'd boil this asshole alive in oil. It's a good thing nobody listens to me.

I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some filthy pagan. I thanked The Savior for his many blessings upon my life. For instance, eating junk food is a wonderful experience. Sadly, lots of people will never experience this type of joy. They spend their lives starving themselves to look good in skinny jeans. Things could always be worse. I'm just glad that I wasn't born in Hollywood, California.

I went to bed at 10 p.m. I didn't dream. I woke up at 6 a.m. and drank a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. Many Koreans were arrested at Incheon Airport for smuggling gold. The men hid the precious nuggets up their asses while the women used both their asses and viginas. It's easy to make a profit with smuggled gold because the powers-that-be boost the price with a 15% tax. Go figure. Here's the link.

I turned on Fox News. Twenty-two innocent people were blown to bits in Manchester, England. Who is responsible? You guessed it. Another Muslim fanatic. Most of the victims were young women. One dead girl is only eight-years-old. The suicide bomber was a British citizen. His parents came to the UK as refugees from Libya. Islam is the religion of death.

Anyway, my quiver is empty. So long for now, and God bless everybody. Cheers.

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