Saturday, July 15, 2017

Farewell


Hello, my friends. I've decided to take a job in China, and I'll be leaving Korea on August 21st. With that said, there is no point in having a blog called Eating Dog In Korea if I don't live in Korea. Therefore, I started a new blog called Eating Dog In China. Stop by and visit. Thanks. See you there. 

United States airman accused of rape in Osan

(An American airman stands accused of raping a Korean woman.)

Yesterday, I had chicken and French fries for dinner. The meal was very good. The fries were hot and crisp and salty--just the way I like them. My wife's a wonderful cook. She excels in all things feminine. She's a regular Asian Martha Stewart. I washed the vittles down with several glasses of generic cola. I'm a broke dead dick, so I can't afford the good stuff.

I read the internet news from China. Several men were busted for fraud. They sold a so-called porno app to many unsuspecting dupes. When the victims purchased the technology, they soon discovered it was a big zero. No filth, no smut, no nothing. The culprits made millions of dollars with this scam. They will now spend the next several years in jail for their dishonesty. Porn is big money. In fact, watching strangers fornicate is very popular across the globe. Here's the link.

I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some filthy atheist. I thanked The Savior for his many blessings upon my life. For instance, it's fun to eat French fries and drink cola in the comfort of my own home. Sadly, lots of people will never experience this type of joy. They spend their days scavenging through garbage dumps in order to find food. Things could always be worse. I'm just glad that I wasn't born in Djibouti.

I went to bed at 10 p.m. I didn't dream. I woke up at 7 a.m. and drank a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. A United States airman stands accused of raping a Korean woman. She was drunk when he took her to a hotel room for coitus. As a father with sons, this story scares me. Having sex with an inebriated woman is now seen as sexual assault. Political correctness has officially run amok. It's best for a young man to keep it in his pants until he finds a sexual partner whom he can trust. Here's the link.

(Be careful out there.)

I turned on Fox News. Donald Trump Jr. met with a Russian lawyer in order to dig up dirt on Hillary Clinton. His meeting was certainly unseemly, but it doesn't constitute a crime. The democrats are guilty of the same shit. They met with the Ukrainians to discredit Trump. I'm a huge fan of The Donald. I like his travel ban and his stance on fair trade. I also want to build a wall across the Mexican border. Maybe I'm a pig.

Anyway, my quiver is empty. So long for now, and God bless everybody. Feel free to join me on Reddit. Cheers.

Wednesday, July 12, 2017

How to get a Chinese Z-visa while living in Korea

(Have no fear. You can get a Z-visa while living in Korea.)

Getting a Z-visa for employment in China can often be a complete pain in the ass. And its even more frustrating getting the visa while living in Korea. Some people will even tell you that you must first fly home in order to get the paperwork done.

Well, they're wrong. You can accomplish this daunting task right here on the peninsula. First, you should contact a company named Biztrans.  The phone number for Biztrans is 02-7331-135. If you don't speak Korean, don't bother trying. Instead, have one of your many Korean friends make the call on your behalf.

There's another option. The email for Biztrans is biztrans11@daum.net. The service is both prompt and professional. The first thing they will ask for is a scanned copy of your degree and teaching certificate (if applicable). They'll proceed to get the documents authenticated in the United States for a fee. My buddy paid 550,000 won to get his degree and certificate authenticated. It's not cheap, but it beats hopping on a plane to get the stuff done.

You will also need a criminal background check. You can get that done from here on the peninsula, too. Go to your local Korean cop-shop and ask for a background check for an overseas stay or foreign permission. The regular background check just won't cut it. This can take anywhere from 2 to 5 business days. Again, for better service, bring a Korean friend. Send the document to Biztrans, and they will get it authenticated by the Chinese Embassy in Seoul.

All the hard stuff is over. The rest of the process should go very smoothly--depending on your employer.

Have a wonderful day, and God bless. If you find this post helpful, please leave a comment. Cheers.

Tuesday, July 11, 2017

Scrapping HIV test for native English teachers 'unacceptable'

(Most Koreans don't like homosexuals.)

Yesterday, I had beef fajitas for dinner. The meal was quite good. My wife is the beef fajita queen. She's a wonderful cook. In fact, she excels in all things feminine. I washed the vittles down with several glasses of generic cola. I'm a broke dead dick, so I can't afford the good stuff.

I read the news from China. Five people from the Shanghai neighborhood of Pudang were caught selling expired olive oil. The Italian companies sent these folks new expiration labels. The criminals had ten thousand bottles of the stuff. If they had managed to sell all of their stock, they would have made more than a million dollars. Life is filled with temptations. Sometimes, these sins are hard to resist. It's difficult to say no to a million bucks. Here's the link.

I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some dirty pagan. I thanked The Savior for his many blessings upon my life. For instance, it's nice to eat beef in the comfort of my apartment. It's also fun to drink cheap cola. Sadly, many people will never experience this type of joy. They slake their thirst with malaria-ridden water and feast on the carcasses of dead hippos. Things could always be worse. I'm just glad that I wasn't born in the Central African Republic.

I went to bed at 10 p.m. I didn't dream. I woke up at 6 a.m. and drank a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. A Korean Christian group is angry that English teachers are no longer being tested for HIV. These people feel that westerners are a little bit lax in policing homosexuality. They want to protect Koreans by deporting anybody who tests positive for the virus. Here's the link.

I turned on Fox News. Donald Trump Jr. stands accused by the liberal media of fraternizing with the Russians. It's the same old story, same old song and dance. The elites just can't handle the fact that a populist won the White House. And let me tell you something else. If they run a loser like Elizabeth Warren in 2020, he'll probably win again. They have nobody but themselves to blame.

Anyway, my quiver is empty. So long for now, and God bless everybody. Feel free to join me at Reddit. Cheers.

Monday, July 10, 2017

Dog mauls 78-year-old owner to death

(A vicious dog kills an old lady from Seoul.)

Yesterday, I took my family to dinner. We had barbecue pork with all the fixings--sauteed onions, Chinese mushrooms, kimchi, etc. The meal was wonderful. I enjoy going to restaurants in Korea. I washed the vittles down with two bottles of soju. I also drank a large bottle of beer. I became quite drunk. A good time was had by all.

I read the internet news. The Chinese government is cracking down on the LGBT community. All homosexual-related stories over the internet are officially banned. The powers-that-be are doing this to protect the people from depraved forms of sex. Their words, not mine. I don't agree with gay marriage or homosexual adoption. But this type of extreme censorship is a bit much. On this issue, the Chinese government needs to take a flying screw at a rolling donut. Big Brother shouldn't tell us what to read or watch. Here's the link.

I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some dirty pagan. I thanked The Savior for his many blessings upon my life. For instance, it's fun to have the money to eat meat every now and then. It's also fun to get drunk on soju. Lots of people will never experience this type of joy. They're so poor that they use their hands as toilet paper. Things could always be worse. I'm just glad that I wasn't born in the Philippines.

I went to bed at 11 p.m. I didn't dream. I woke up at 6 a.m. and drank a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. A 78-year-old woman from Seoul was killed by her pet dog. The beast weighed over 40 pounds. She simply didn't have the physical ability to fight the animal off. The powers-that-be immediately put the canine to sleep. The government has now decided to strengthen the current leash laws. Here's the link.

I turned on CNBC and watched Meet the Press. Both the democrats and the republicans are angry that Trump wasn't tougher on Putin at the recent G20 meeting in Hamburg, Germany. They keep floating this false narrative that the president was elected because of Russian interference. Here's what I believe. President Trump is a gift from God. Internationally, our relationship with China and Russia will improve vastly, which will help with the issue of world peace. Domestically, it's only a matter of time before the disgraceful Roe v. Wade is overturned. What's not to love?

Anyway, my quiver is empty. So long for now, and God bless everybody. Feel free to join me on Reddit. Cheers.

Wednesday, July 5, 2017

Kpop idols are receiving death threats

(An internet poster threatens to massacre the popluar group Apink with a knife.)

Yesterday, I had leftover gumbo for dinner. The food was fantastic. It was prepared with shrimp, sausage, and potatoes. The sauce was both hot and flavorful. My wife's a fantastic cook. She excels in all things feminine. I washed the vittles down with several glasses of generic cola. I'm a broke dead dick, so I can't afford the good stuff. The entire experience was magical.

I read the latest online news. There's an orthodox Jewish school in England called Vishnitz. The academy caters to young girls ages three through eight. Vishnitz received a failing grade from the English government. Why? They refused to teach their students about homosexuality and gender reassignment. A talking head claimed that Vishnitz's actions are against British values. This loser needs to go take a flying screw at a rolling donut. Who instructs toddlers on the topic of sodomy? Have we really come to this point in Western culture? Here's the link.

I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some dirty misanthrope. I thanked The Savior for his many blessings upon my life. For instance, it's nice to eat gumbo in my comfortable apartment. Sadly, lots of people will never experience this type of joy. They come from backward nations where shellfish and pork are frowned upon. Things could always be worse. I'm just glad that I wasn't born in Saudi Arabia.

I went to bed at 11 p.m. I dreamt about Conor McGregor. He acted poorly at a press conference, and Dana White made him apologize in public.

I woke up at 6 a.m. and drank a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. Disturbed internet users are threatening to murder famous Kpop idols. For instance, one man threatened to massacre the popular girl band Apink with a knife. The police had to send protection to the group's rehearsals. It gets worse. An ultra-nationalist Korean promised to stab a Japanese singer named Mina because he doesn't want her in his country. Here's the link.

I turned on Fox News. The talking heads believe that the United States will simply have to deal with a nuclear North Korea the same way it dealt with a nuclear China back in the day--which means bringing the reclusive state in from the cold. I agree. America simply doesn't have the juice to stop the regime from acquiring the weapons. The Russians and the Chinese don't give a flying screw, and without their pressure, the situation is hopeless. But what do I know?

Anyway, my quiver is empty. So long for now, and God bless everybody. Join me at Reddit. Cheers.

Tuesday, July 4, 2017

Gangnam-gu removes 27 illegal brothels

(Seoul closes 27 illegal brothels.)

Yesterday, my wife made chicken soup for dinner. The poultry was served in a broth filled with rice and ginseng. It tasted great. The woman is a wonderful cook. She's a regular Asian Martha Stewart. I washed the vittles down with several glasses of generic cola. I'm a broke dead dick, so I can't afford the good stuff.

I watched CNN. A thirteen-year-old girl named Shavon Randle got caught up in a drug theft. The boyfriend of one of her relatives stole twenty-two pounds of marijuana from a Dallas drug dealer. The dealer kidnapped Shavon and murdered her. He also killed an unnamed 19-year-old boy. The murderer and his accomplice are now in police custody. If I were king of the world, I'd have both of these assholes burned at the stake. It's a good thing that nobody listens to me.

I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some filthy pagan. I thanked The Savior for his many blessings upon my life. For instance, it's fun to watch television in the comfort of my own apartment. Sadly, lots of people will never experience this type of joy. They live in the deep dark jungle and have no access to electricity. Things could always be worse. I'm just glad that I wasn't born in Guatemala.

I went to bed at 10 p.m. I didn't dream. I woke up at 6 a.m. and drank a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. The powers-that-be in Seoul removed 27 whorehouses in the exclusive neighborhood of Gagnam. The brothels are too close to schools and residential areas. Prostitution is supposedly illegal on the peninsula. But you can't walk ten feet without spotting a bordello. Here's the link.

I turned on Fox News. Trump has once again set the world on fire with his Twitter account. His comments about Mika the idiot and Joe the psycho weren't enough. Now he Tweeted a video of himself beating a man with a CNN logo super-imposed over his head. The media is claiming that Trump is inciting violence against them. They are also accusing my president of being anti-Semitic. I don't get it. The guy's daughter is a Jew. There's nothing anti-Semitic about the man.

Anyway, my quiver is empty. So long for now, and God bless everybody. Don't forget to join me on Reddit. Cheers.

Monday, July 3, 2017

Thai students 'molested, exploited' during internships in South Korea: report

(Several Thai interns claim that they were harassed.)

Yesterday, my wife made Louisiana-style gumbo from scratch. It came with shrimp, potatoes, and sausage. The meal was damn good. She worked in the kitchen for nearly six hours. My wife excels in all things feminine. She's a regular Asian Martha Stewart. I washed the vittles down with several glasses of generic cola. I'm a broke dead dick, so I can't afford the good stuff.

I read the Chinese news. A 60-year-old man from Shanghai named Xue stole 15 kilos of crawfish from a local eatery. This isn't the first time the old bugger has been caught stealing food. He's a one man crime wave. The crawfish are valued at over $100. I cannot tell a lie. I love eating mudbugs. If Xue had invited me to feast on the stolen shellfish, I would have gladly participated. I consume crayfish like a real man. I always suck the brains right out of their heads. Here's the link.

I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some filthy nihilist. I thanked The Savior for his many blessings upon my life. For instance, my apartment is hot these days, but not unbearable. Plus I'm well-fed and chubby. Sadly, lots of people will never experience this type of joy. They spend their days living in huts with tin roofs. They bake during the daytime and freeze when the sun goes down. Things could always be worse. I'm just glad that I wasn't born in an Indian slum.

I went to bed at 10 p.m. I dreamt that my wife murdered both my children. She committed the murders with a spear. The nightmare was very realistic. I shook like a leaf.

I woke up at 5 a.m. and drank a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. Eight Thai students claim that they were molested and exploited by their South Korean hosts. The girls said that they were kissed and touched on their thighs. The boys, meanwhile, stated that they were forced to work from dusk till dawn at various grueling tasks throughout the hot days. The powers-that-be are currently investigating the matter. Here's the link. 

I turned on Fox News. A 28-year-old man from Pennsylvania named David Desper got cut off in traffic. He became enraged and took out his .40 pistol. He then proceeded to shoot the young woman who had offended him with her driving. Her name was Bianca Roberson. The bullet hit the poor 18-year-old girl right in the head. She died instantly. Mr. Desper is now in custody. Let's hope that the authorities deal with this loon harshly.

Anyway, my quiver is empty. So long for now, and God bless everybody. Join me a Reddit. Cheers.

Sunday, July 2, 2017

WANTED: Suspects of 'golf driving range' murder

(There was a brutal murder in Changwon.)

Yesterday, I took my family to dinner. We went to a chicken restaurant. I like chicken a great deal. It is both inexpensive and delicious. We ate lots and lots of fried poultry. I washed the vittles down with two bottles of soju. I also helped my wife drink a pitcher of beer. I became quite drunk. A good time was had by all.

I read the Chinese news. A street magician from Chengdu kept asking attractive ladies to participate in one of his tricks. He proceeded to fondle their breasts while attempting to balance a coin. His friend recorded all the mischief on a smart phone. He then unwisely uploaded the video. The police detained the man for questioning. The culprit eventually apologized to all of mainland China over his Weibo account. Here's the link.

I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some dirty pagan. I thanked The Savior for his many blessing upon my life. For instance, I haven't been sexually assaulted by a naughty street performer. That's certainly a boon. Furthermore, it's nice to bring the family to a restaurant from time to time. Sadly, lots of people will never experience this type of joy. They spend their days eating fried tarantulas. Things could always be worse. I'm just glad that I wasn't born in the Amazon Rain Forrest.

I went to bed at 10 p.m. I didn't dream. I woke up at 6 a.m. and drank a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. A 47-year-old woman from Changwon decided to spend her evening hitting golf balls at a local driving range. Three men abducted and murdered her. They stuffed her corpse in a bag and placed it under the Jinsu Bridge in Jinju. The powers-that-be are currently investigating the matter. Here's the link.

I turned on Fox News. President Trump gave a rousing speech to many war veterans in order to celebrate the upcoming Independence Day. He thanked them for their service. It was nice to see. Unlike President Obama, Big Don actually loves the United States of America. Trump also promised to build the wall and listen to his generals in matters of war. I love the man. To all the Trump-haters, I have just one thing to say. Go take a flying screw at a rolling donut.

Anyway, my quiver is empty. So long for now, and God bless everybody. Please subscribe to my Reddit account. Cheers.

Saturday, July 1, 2017

The psychology of public masturbation

(Too many people are masturbating in public.)

Yesterday, I took my family to a restaurant. This particular establishment features an all-you-can-eat pork barbecue. All of the side dishes are included, too. Onions. Chinese mushrooms. Kimchi. The food was excellent. I stuffed myself like a pig, and the juice from the meat dripped down my fat chin. I drank two bottles of soju and a large bottle of beer with the vittles. I got quite drunk. A good time was had by all.

I read some Chinese news. A taxi driver from Dalian picked up four college girls looking for a ride into town. They fell asleep on the journey. The cabbie proceeded to use his cellphone to take dirty pictures and videos of the young women. He also stands accused of feeling them up. The victims refused to pay for the trip and reported this pervert to the proper authorities. This story is big news on the mainland. Here's the link.

I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some filthy atheist. I thanked The Savior for his many blessings upon my life. For instance, I've never been sexually assaulted by a horny cab driver. That's certainly a plus. Furthermore, it's nice to eat meat from time to time. Sadly, lot's of people will never experience this type of joy. They spend their days picking through the trash in order to find their next meal. Things could always be worse. I'm just glad that I wasn't born in Djibouti.

I went to bed at 10 p.m. I dreamt that my wife got into a car accident. She could no longer speak. I'm not sure if I was happy or sad.

I woke up at 6 a.m. and drank a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. Several Koreans have been apprehended for public masturbation over the last few years. Two were police officers, one was a professional baseball player, and another was a powerful attorney from the island of Jeju. Experts are blaming this epidemic on porn. They claim that men are simply having too many sexual fantasies because of the internet. Here's the link.

I turned on Fox News. Tucker Carlson spoke about a dog festival in mainland China. More than 10,000 canines were slaughtered so that Chinese men could eat the meat and have better erections. Mr. Carlson was outraged. He called the festival barbaric. His major beef with the celebration is that the dogs were tortured before being killed. I stay out of the dog meat debate. Different strokes for different folks.

Anyway, my quiver is empty. So long for now, and God bless everybody.